Other than the predictable, steady income, I find nothing appealing about the traditional approach to work. As I’m seeing moderate amounts of success in the gig economy, I’m more and more confident I can build my business to be stable and with more diversified income streams than relying one full-time employer.
In due time I realized comparing my parenting to anybody else was ridiculous. All families are different and kids’ needs and circumstances vary wildly. Also, if I’m not modeling authenticity with my children, how will they learn to be true to themselves?
I haven’t always felt connected to a Christian community, but somehow I managed to find a home at St. Mary. The challenging part of this situation is I’m often skeptical and have questions and struggles with faith, spirituality and organized religion. The irony of these circumstances are not lost on me.
I couldn’t have imagined when Harry pulled that box out of the closet just how deep I would go with this. As my mind got lost in the world of that tractor, I was able to sort through the anxieties, let them go and formulate ways to get back on track. I completely forgot the value in not thinking about my problems in order to solve my problems.
As we finished up our coffee and prepared to part ways, Olga suggested I start a series where I regularly meet someone for coffee to discuss the challenges of midlife and then blog about the experience. Now that was feedback that I enjoyed hearing! Realizing the impact a meet-up can have for both parties, this seems like a no-brainer.
Ultimately, I lost sight of the transactional nature of work. I actually believed my employer cared about me beyond what I could provide for them. In good faith, I gave my all. I dedicated myself to the companies I worked for and expected more in return than they were willing to give, even if they said otherwise.
A year or so ago, I found an Instagram account called Nature is Metal. It’s a graphic, brutally honest and violent representation of the animal kingdom. The curators are clearly fans of the unforgiving nature of Mother Nature. Recent posts include hyenas eating a lion’s head, an anaconda swallow a fawn and zebras murdering their young. This is not for the faint of heart.
As this became my new norm, I thought about how important eye contact was in feeling acknowledged and how a simple grin connected me to other people. With my new-found confidence, I started trying to make eye contact and smile at everyone I encountered.
I’m down two more pounds this week and while it’s great to be at 15 total lost, I’ve decided the weekly weigh-ins are a bit too frequent. I want to focus my energy on growing my strength and stamina and measuring my progress through how my clothes fit and how I feel.
For decades I assumed most of the people around me had everything figured out—they knew more than me about school, work, relationships and life in general. To survive, I lived and died by fake it ‘til you make it.
Reconnecting with a person from my distant past was a great way to tap into who Mollie Braun was. It also reminded me that I’m nowhere near who or what I thought I’d be at this point in my life. And maybe that’s a good thing.
Now that my scale is working properly and I’m settled into the habit of moving regularly, I’m rolling along with 2 pounds lost this week.
